On Touching the Void: Abstract Art as a Pursuit of Truth

I've been rummaging through my soul, trying to figure out how to talk about my art. My "why" as they call it.

I initially detested the idea - we don't ask writers to illustrate their stories, so why are we hell bent on expecting visual artists to verbally explain that which came from beyond language?

Enter art school - where I’ve been making art I'd usually never choose make. The internal resistance I've faced around making art that resembles reality has been so extreme that it's now made me want to answer this question for my own curiosity.

I mean, what is my damn problem? Why am I so intoxicated by making abstract art, and bored to tears by anything else?

Turns out, when I make abstract art, it's a thrill seeking behaviour, where the thrill is chasing truth. The kind of truth that exists outside humanity and inside the underpinnings of creation and decay.

Truth that persists whether humanity, or anything within our realm of understanding or reality, exists or not.

Searching for ultimate truth at the site of something being created for the 1st time seems a likely place to look. It's a front row seat to the fabric of existence spitting out a tiny miracle.

Each time I witness something pop into being, I'm granted access to touching the void for a brief moment, to touching that ultimate truth.

It's dizzying, intoxicating, absurd, and kind of ridiculous - and, if I hadn't somehow managed to summon a tiny god within myself to help me experience that moment, it could be deeply unsettling.

And just like that, the moment passes and I am returned here, having narrowly avoided a descent into irrevocable madness, and ready to chase my next hit.